No parent is prepared for the loss of a child, and when it happens, their world is changed forever. The grief, guilt, and anguish felt are acute and lasting. The death of a son means the loss of more than just a precious life. It represents the loss of future experiences and future hopes. Parents can find comfort in knowing that their grief and mourning are normal and that many other parents have lived through similar tragedies.
1. Here I Stand
Here I stand the fourth year at your grave,
Still trying to accept the decision God made.
I drive myself crazy for a hint or a clue,
Of why at nineteen He had to take you.
I would have made the choice, if I’d been given one,
Today someone will die; either you or your son.
I would have stood tall and cried, “Lord! Let it be me!
He has his whole life to live and a precious baby!”
But obviously God doesn’t work that way,
For whatever reason, He wanted you that day.
And now here I stand with tears in my eyes,
Every day for four years, I can’t tell you goodbye.
I only say I love you and try to concentrate,
To hear your voice, to feel your touch, to see your handsome face.
And if I live to be a hundred I’ll still ask Him everyday,
Why didn’t He take me instead of my only child away?
2. For The Need Of You
I need you to touch,
I need you to see,
I need you so much,
I need you with me.
My life feels so empty,
My heart feels so cold.
I need you beside me,
I need you to hold.
Why were you taken?
I ask that each day,
But no one will answer,
I therefore now pray.
I pray that you’re happy,
I pray that you’re safe,
I pray that I’ll hear you,
And that I have faith.
That’s all I have now
I have to believe
In life beyond this one,
We all must achieve.
Come to me, Liam,
And whisper my name.
Tell me you’re happy,
and I’ll be the same.
My life at the moment
Is empty and dark.
The light that once shone
Has gone out in my heart.
3. Life Goes On
Her 26 year old son died from injuries from an auto accident and as an organ donor. The organ donor bracelets phrase, “Life Goes On” inspired her to write this on the 3rd anniversary of his death.
It’s true what they say, when a child is born,
a mother’s heart is no longer her own,
It runs and skips and giggles and grins,
And crawls in her lap, for a kiss on the chin,
But where goes her heart, when that child is gone,
Is it true what they say, that life goes on.
A thousand ninety-five days, and the clock still ticks,
3 whole years, the months – 36,
Does the passage of time mean it should make sense,
Can loss be measured in time increments.
As I yearn for the day when I’ll again see my son,
Is it true what they say, that life goes on.
I still breathe in and out and arise every day,
And work, and struggle, and yes, even play,
Things will get better, I’ve been told many times,
But “different” is the status for those left behind,
Time can’t heal all wounds nor break all bonds,
Can it be true what they say, that life goes on.
In the air and wind, I feel your strong embrace,
And your kisses from butterflies that land on my face,
I see your smile in the beams of the sun,
The twinkle of your eyes now shines in Eden,
And I hear your laugh in the lyrics of song,
Is it possibly true, that life goes on.
It’s strange to think that your heart still beats,
Inside some stranger, whom I’ll never meet,
Does he know he carries a heart of gold,
From my sweet boy, who will never grow old,
So many lives saved by your own,
Yes – it’s true what they say, that life goes on.
4. My Beautiful Baby Boy
I loved him dearly
More and more every second he was with me
I held him so gently
Then tears began to pour
Because I knew by the end of the day I wouldn’t have him anymore
I’d done anything to keep him out of harm’s way
But that didn’t stop God’s will
I still lost my baby that day
In my arms he died
So for weeks now I have cried
I just can’t understand what was on God’s mind
How could he do this, It was so unkind
To take my baby
And before he could even see his daddy
I would have taken his place
Just for his daddy to see his face
I’d gave him my every breath
I would’ve given God every beat from my heart
I’d ripped it right out of my chest
Just so he wouldn’t take Matt and Keagan apart
He should have at least given them a small start
It was so unfair
because God didn’t even give Matt a chance to be there
compared to my feeling of losing my child
This poem was nice and mild
Because I could explain the hate
but it would really do no good cause it would still be too late
5. A Tribute To Tyrone
No words I write could ever say
How sad and empty I feel today
The Angels came for you
Much sooner than I planned
I’ll brave the bitter grief that comes
And I’ll try my best understand
Tyrone, why did you have to go away
Why wasn’t it right for you to stay
In my heart Tyrone will always be
I love him dearly and I know he’ll watch over me
What I’m suffering seems so unfair
But one thing is for certain
My love for him will always be there
Tyrone, my son you always will be
The most important part of my heart’s memory
I’ll cherish the moments I held you in my arms
And I’m sure that if you had of stayed longer
You would have graced me with your charms
A thousand words won’t bring you back
I know because I’ve tried
Neither will a thousand tears
I know because I’ve cried
Now you’re up in Heaven
With the Angels up above
They will take my place for now
And they’ll give you all their love
So go and rest in peace now
My little boy so dear
For all my love and memories
I will hold forever near
6. When God Comforted Me
From heaven he was delivered
As a baby unto you,
When God said to me softly
I’m trusting you to do
Everything that’s needed
To nurture and to love
He’s your little angel
Sent from me above.
You see…spirits cannot be
Held, hugged or kissed
The body that was his vessel
Is what you’ll surely miss
But his spirit that I shared with you
On that one special day
That is what I promise
To never take away.
So he is back in heaven now
The earth was not his place
He taught you all he could
About dignity and grace
So as you grieve and weep
To see him once again
I promise he’s waiting here
When you get to heaven.